What are the odds of these things happening to one man?

My little brother told me I was the true heir to the British throne back in the seventies. He asked me to abdicate, I said no. In 2005ish, I figured out a translation for who the "beast" in Revelation 13 of the Bible is that is unlike anything anyone has ever heard. (Evolution and biochemistry, 666 being carbon 12). I then realized I fit the description of the King of Kings, Lord of Lords. My best friend told me to check the Dead Sea Scrolls and I also fit the description of the Chosen One! Paris Hilton got kicked by a horse in my hometown. Hughie Tn of Outlaws fame died here. On 6-3-74 I inadvertantly killed my big brother by calling him to a family fight. On 6-3-77 a black cloud followed me from Hilton Dr. (5 miles from where Ms. Paris was kicked) to Tampa, Florida and rained out the show, (Led Zeppelin) and they played three songs, Song Remains the Same, Sick Again, Nobody's Fault But Mine. Four years after the death of psychic Eileen J. Garrett, (1893-1970) my wife, Judy Garrett, started seeing ghosts, one was a Roman Soldier. These sightings occured on Hilton Dr. I've always wanted a pygmy rattler and got him on 9-11-01. My only begotten son was hit by a truck on 9-11-99. I was hit on 11-9-99.